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Self Esteem or Self Respect?

Many people these days have got the notion that they need an desire more self esteem, the amount of inquires I get each week for this thing is amazing. However have you ever considered what it is and why you want it? What is the reality behind this elusive obvious?

At the moment you think that you don’t have enough and if you had this one little thing then you would be OK however this is fortune cookie thinking. So what is self esteem (SE)?

All it is, is what you think about your self. If you encourage you support you, have a mature mind and have learnt how to control and direct your conscious and subconscious minds so that they work together instead of fighting then what you say to you is nice.

It is your internal dialogue. What you say to you. What you think. Usually not based on any external facts it can be based on total fantasy.It has no external basis, but also lacks checks, balances and feedback and it is effected by your moods and the states that you are currently in. There are big dangers promoting high self esteem.

Self respect on the other hand is based on what you do. How you live and conduct your life and is based on external provable facts. That is a big difference. If you have self respect (SR) you will never need to worry about SE as it will not be a problem.

If you have a good foundation of behaviours, actions and habits if you indulge in living your life well and balanced you will have all the factors that you need. If you are dishonest and behave like a child, when you do not get your own way if your thinking is controlled by your inner child then you will behave like a kid Very difficult to have high self esteem when you are living a lie.

Self Esteem or Self Respect? As SE is directed inward and is not based on what is really happening in the world, yours or anyone else, then SR is directed outwards, however it has a great effect on what you you think and feel about your self.SR is based on what you do. It is also ongoing it is how you live. The past has little to do with it and how you feel, it is about what you are doing now or are about to do in your future.

One of the real cool things about high SR is that it is measurable and provable. You do not just become a legend in your own mind, you walk your talk and your moods will not effect it as you also have the maturity to have learnt how to use and control them and no one can take away self respect.