Self Limiting Beliefs and Habits.
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The self improvement lobby and most hypnotherapists and NLP practitioners will talk about self limiting negative beliefs and habits.
What are they?
Well they are habits, beliefs and behaviours that limit our growth and enjoyment and pleasure in your life. The programs that keep us where we are.
Beliefs are not real and most people have not chosen what to believe, habits are acquired and chosen to enhance our lives. Behaviours are just picked up with out any conscious intent, so what the hell is going on?
Most people have little understanding as to how there brain and mind works, so they puddle along with life as it is. And your control mind you subconscious mind or basic self is quite happy to let this happen. It likes an easy life.
This is the area of your mind that really is in control of you, it is like your store house of you and not only controls all the events in your body, it also controls your emotions, feelings, habits and behaviours. It is your filing cabinet, and like any filing cabinet when you want something you go to the file pull it and gets the information.
Now your basic self when any situation happens it will pull a file to look at, and go how do I behave in this situation last time?it gets the information and then tells you how to react all at an unconscious level and in an instant.
So unless you have great awareness you have no idea why you do or say what you do.
Usually a self limiting belief is considered as a negative thing and it usually is however at a subconscious level of your mind it is not, it was designed to protect you, to help you to move through your realities safely.
It has a positive intent to keep you safe and functioning as programmed, even if it is painful to you. I know that this may make no sense to some of you however please bare with me a little longer.
Imagine a situation where for example a wife and mother is abused and has been for some years.
When you ask such ladies why they stay in this situation they rationalise in the way that most women do, which is to do the behaviour first and then find some way to explain there actions after, justification after the fact.
Many of the excuses make no sense to some one not in her situation, yet to someone in the same boat they fully understand. So reasons are made up to explain the behaviours. Her basic self the subconscious mind in control, will look at the current situation and go something like.
“O.K. I have survived like this for the last 10 years so as I pull the files it is apparent that I will still be here in another 10 years.”
“He is not abusive all the time so there is a very good chance for survival.
He contributes to food and shelter and comfort some times”.
If the lady has children then her own survival and pain will be put on hold to ensure that her DNA survives and is passed on.
So the self limiting beliefs and habits do have a very positive intent at an unconscious level.
Let me give you one more example.
A lovely lady I know regularly sabotages her relationships once she falls in love and has captured the heart of a man, she then begins a process of testing and driving the man away, and if he will not move emotionally from her, she will change city’s or countries.
At a conscious level this is absurd, yet at another level of her mind it is survival, she can predict what will happen in her life even if it unpleasant. She has developed a way to stay in her comfort zone even though she tells me she regrets some of the lovers she has lost, the possibilities that will never be.
So when someone has a limiting pattern there is also a very positive intent behind it. As hypnotherapists we understand that a self limiting habit is not, all that is needed is growth and maturity on our clients part.
Using hypnosis and NLP we do discover the program and re-negotiate the deal.
To allow the control mind to see new ways of behaving and install new beliefs habits and programs. Often we do have to work out a new deal and this can be challenging as to the basis self what it has done has worked and is working.
If we go in with all guns blazing the control mind will basically ignore us and this is were a skilled master of the art of suggestion hypnosis and NLP really pays.
The gentle and highly effective use of pilgrim self hypnosis Mp3's that we use are a very powerful way to find a new and better way to deal with your subconscious mind and do act as a defrag and virus scanner to your subconscious control levels of mind.